We’ve all heard urban myths and legends about everything from Bigfoot to Area 51, and chances are if you are searching for your perfect dress, you have also heard some wedding dress shopping myths. We are here to expose and debunk 16 of these common myths.
1. I will cry when I find my perfect dress.
MYTH
When you know it’s your dress, we call that “the Moment”. Many brides do have the Moment with tears! Some completely break down as the reality hits (OMG, I’m getting MARRIED!) Some experience a combination of a laugh-cry type thing. We love the brides who say, “I’m sure I won’t cry, I’m not like that.” When those tears come, whoa boy. It’s for real and there is no denying she found the ONE.
Others light up, smile ear to ear and say YES with a cheer! And then there are brides who simply know and confidently say, I love it. This is my dress, this is the one. You may not cry, but you WILL have your Moment. Trust that process. You’ll know — and that is NOT a myth!
2. I will know my dress as soon as I see it.
MYTH
As any experienced Stylist will tell you, there is a process to finding your dream dress. It’s not a matter of just finding the prettiest gown in the shop and calling it a day. There are many factors that should go into finding the dress for your special day:
What silhouette flatters your figure most? Where is the wedding taking place? What fabrics are you most comfortable in? What type of wedding are you having? Indoor or outdoor? Day or evening? Huge celebration or a micro wedding? How much detail work are you looking for? Do you want to deal with a train or would you rather have a cathedral veil for drama? What price point are you comfortable with?
All these answers are to be found in one dress and that requires a thoughtful plan of action. You will no doubt put on numerous dresses that are breathtaking and fulfill your vision. But, does it check off all your “must haves”?
Consistently, we have brides end an appointment with TWO favorite dresses which they need to weigh against each to make that final choice. While it does occasionally happen that a bride will click with her gown right away, more times than not, there isn’t a definitive “ta-dah” moment until the bride gives it much consideration against the others.
You will know your perfect dress when you see it, ON YOU!
3. To find my dream wedding dress, I will drive to dozens of places and try everything on to be confident in my decision.
MYTH
While this sounds like an excellent research plan, I can tell you with certainty that it is not. The much-anticipated, incredibly exciting “Say Yes” moment becomes a chore.
With the Internet’s assistance, you will find thousands of dresses with similar silhouettes, features and colors that you will be trying to cram into your brain. Even the most detail-oriented bride will buckle under the weight of all the information being thrown at her by Google, her friends and the Stylists she encounters at each place she visits near and far. It becomes a frustrating and overwhelming experience, which is not the memory you want of your wedding dress shopping experience.
Brides come in to see me with endless photos of gowns they’ve tried. Constant refrains are:
“Wait, why did we keep this picture?” “I don’t remember what was on the skirt/bodice that we liked…” “Was this the one Mom liked?” “Is this the same dress we tried on at the other place?” And our very favorite: “Didn’t we all hate this dress?”
Let your Stylist curate a beautiful selection for you based on your likes, venue, season, and body type. Keep an open mind. Start from there.
Keep it simple. Find 1-3 reputable stores max who will make you a priority. Visit their websites, research the lines they carry, price range, return policy, etc. Read their reviews. (Read our reviews here!) Make your appointment and try on gowns that you know will work both aesthetically and financially for your wedding. There is enough stress involved in wedding planning, be strategic in your dress search.
4. Everyone will know if I buy a less expensive/unknown designer dress.
MYTH
You pay for the designer’s name. There can be a huge difference in price between a well-known designer and a lesser-known one. There are gorgeous inexpensive wedding gowns to be found so please do not judge a dress by its price – try it on. If you can’t tell that the dress is a budget-friendly gown, how will anyone else? This leads into another one of the wedding dress shopping myths.
5. The more expensive the dress, the better it is.
MYTH, MYTH, MYTH!
One of the biggest misconceptions in the wedding industry. The most expensive dress is absolutely not the best dress.
In my many years as a bridal consultant, I have been privileged to work in different parts of the country and at different bridal boutiques. I have worked with many high profile designers as well as median designers. While it is true that most gowns are priced according to the quality of fabric, lace, intricate beadwork, and embroidery used in a design, it is also true that you are paying for the privilege of wearing a well-known designers creation. The dress with the most expensive price tag is not the “best” one, it is simply the one that can charge more for his/her name.
There is absolutely no reason for a bride to overpay for a beautifully designed and well-constructed gown. The average cost of a wedding dress in our region is between $1500-$2000. Today’s textiles are being manufactured with specific purpose and your comfort in mind. And, thankfully, these fabrics are not as expensive as their predecessors which make them more affordable wedding dresses! Silk jersey and matte satins are being utilized by bridal gown manufacturers for more wrinkle free wear and lighter weight gowns. Many times, these modern fabrics provide a lower price point for the consumer.
Although designer wedding gowns command a premium price due to name recognition, I guarantee that no one will know if the appliques on your dress were sewn on by hand or if they were machine stitched.
6.The Consultant will try to push certain dresses to boost her commission.
TRUE
If a store works on commission, this is true. Commissions are incentives to sell, so there is a lot of pressure put on brides to buy either a higher priced dress or old dresses they want to move out. There are stores (like Darianna® Bridal & Tuxedo!) who pay a higher hourly rate and do not offer commission so even if you do not say yes, the stylist makes the same amount of money. There is no commission structure in our store.
7. A Bridal Salon makes money off of the alterations.
TRUE
Sizing in the bridal industry is extremely different from any other piece of clothing you will ever wear or order. Read our blog on sizing and how we try to get the RIGHT size! As Consultants, we can offer you our considerable knowledge and guidance. When discussing which size to wear, make sure to look at your measurements and the size chart of your designer. If the store seems to want to order you a size that doesn’t make sense, ask for the thought process behind it. At our store, we will always explain our size recommendation.
For instance, if a bride’s hip measures to a size 14 but her waist and bust are size 8, we cannot order an 8. She will never get it on. Explaining that we need to fit the hip makes sense. However, if all of the measurements were an 8 and they were suggesting a 14 that would be quite questionable!
Speak up and always let your thoughts be known about sizing.
Brides need not be confined to an overpriced alteration “package” or “flat fee”. Unless you are having major reconstruction to your dress, you will absolutely overpay with a flat fee. In our store, we allow the Bride to choose from several different seamstresses in the area who are extremely skilled and talented in bridal and formal wear alterations. These alteration providers are independently owned and operated, female-owned small businesses. They set their own pricing scale based on the intricacy of the work to be performed.
8. Bridal salons are overpriced. Buying a gown on-line will save me hundreds of dollars.
MYTH
Let’s talk about online shopping for wedding gowns. We’ve all seen the Memes of the “knock-off” dresses and read the horror stories on Reddit. That is not a myth either – many of those knock offs actually do look that bad. Scarily, some even smell terrible, like chemicals or something burned. Many sites have no customer service representative to speak with, no remedy for issues, and you provide your credit card information to an unknown business entity in a foreign country.
There are sites that resell used dresses that are more reputable and we would suggest those over the foreign knock-off sites, however, with something like your wedding dress? Please visit actual bridal retailers. Wait for a sale for great prices! Bridal shops have a customer service department with people there to help you through the entire process! And that peace of mind is worth FAR more than the headaches and stress that can come with the “money you saved”.
9. A great way to find my dress is with my entire family, bridal party, champagne, and treats!
MYTH
One of the biggest wedding dress shopping myths is this one and it comes from the reality shows. Searching for bridal gowns is a memorable and joyous experience. It is also serious and important and requires thought and decisions. A large group drinking champagne does not make for the most productive dress shopping experiences. While it is wonderful to celebrate the final “YES!” with a champagne toast, drinking alcohol is not a good idea throughout the appointment.
And when the attention strays from the bride, attention is diverted from the goal of finding her dress. It makes for “fun” Instagram posts, but it is not helping the bride.
10. I have to sleep on it.
MYTH
All brides are different, some say yes to the first dress they try on, some have to shop for months (and we’ve already told you why that’s not a good idea). But when a bride has an emotional attachment to a dress, whether she cries, or she feels it on the inside, or beams every time she puts it on, if she says yes to the dress, there is a reason.
When a guest says, “You have to sleep on it”, that says she is making the wrong decision in the guest’s eyes. That could ruin the entire experience and have a bride question every decision she tries to make about a future dress. A bride does not have to sleep on this decision, she can say yes confidently because she sees herself walking down the aisle on her wedding day in THAT dress. She can be obsessed over it and move on to other aspects of wedding planning.
11. If I don’t find a dress I love, I can just have it custom made.
MYTH
If you are shopping at multiple stores and don’t find a dress you love, you are looking at the wrong stores/designers or are simply indecisive.
If you are indecisive with dresses that are already made, the stress of attempting to make your own is not the way to go. Can you can have a dress made? Sure. At a price – both financial and mental. You will choose fabrics, laces, appliqués, beading types, underlay colors, strap thickness, neckline dimensions, body measurements, this list goes on and on. And again, if you are an indecisive type person, these options are maddening. You will need to find a dress maker who can produce it in your timeline, within budget, and most importantly one you trust. There are many thousands of dresses out there that you can try on and find the one.
12. My wedding dress has to be white.
MYTH
Wedding dresses today are ivory, mocha, champagne, blush, blue, black, multi-color floral, and even patterns. The most important thing is that you choose what your perfect gown is. If you want a white gown, that’s what you get! If you want something different, there are plenty of options.
13. My dress has to be a traditional bridal ballgown.
MYTH
Wedding dresses come in many styles, the ball gown is just one. While there are elements common through most wedding gowns, the shape is not one. A mermaid wedding dress can be just as Bridal as a ball gown! Your wedding is the perfect opportunity to show your unique personality and authentic self in whichever dress makes you feel like a bride!
14. Plain wedding dresses do not look bridal enough.
MYTH
Today’s modern brides are opting for plain! And simply because the dress is plain does not mean it is not Bridal!
There are gorgeous gowns in fabrics like Mikado, crepe, and silk. Brides can accessorize with their jewelry, wedding shoes, and a veil that make the look uniquely and beautifully Bridal. Plain gowns come in every silhouette from sheath/column to ballgown and are perfect for any venue from a museum to a small restaurant; a large formal wedding to a backyard micro wedding. Short wedding dresses also come in plain silk fabrics, and look adorable for a mini-mony party on a rooftop, a destination wedding on a beach or Las Vegas, or a courthouse wedding. A plain wedding dress is classic bridal and today’s designs give them modern vibes.
15. Wedding dresses take 8-12 months to arrive.
MYTH
Absolutely not. Wedding dresses take up to five months and some are less than that. This timeline is used as a pressure tactic to scare a bride that she must buy right now or you will not get it in time for your wedding date. There is no dress that takes that long to arrive.
16. My group must agree with my dress decision.
MYTH
Your dress is exactly that. YOUR dress. The dress that you fall in love with is the dress you should choose. (The dress that they fall in love with is the dress they can purchase!)
When you are in the dressing room, take a few moments to really look at the dress. Allow the wedding stylists to give you their feedback, after all, they are going on details such as your wedding season, venue, formality, theme, likes and dislikes, but also your body shape and what attributes flatter you. What are the first things you see that you love/don’t love? Have these in mind before you go out to show your group. If they do not agree, weigh out their thoughts to help make an informed decision. Do not discount their opinions, however, do not put a dress you love back simply because they don’t like it.
Your family members and best friends are there for support and should tell you what they think looks better, more flattering, etc. By all means take their opinions into account, but your personal style is what needs to be reflected in your wedding dress.
Do you have a question or know of any additional wedding dress shopping myths you’d like answered that we didn’t cover? Let us know, we’d love to confirm or debunk for you!
Darianna Bridal & Tuxedo is proud to curate the best dress and tuxedo selections for our couples at great prices. It is exciting to continue to add new dress designers (like Evie Young and Serene Bridal), and carry the newest tuxedo styles. It’s a great time to be engaged! If you are in the Philadelphia region, make sure to visit us.