Choosing your wedding party is another exciting part of being a bride to be! Who is standing by your side when you say, “I do” is a personal choice and we have some advice for you to consider.
When we say personal, it is very personal. Your closest and most trusted persons should be by your side. Blood is thicker than water in many cases, but not all. Do not ask someone because you are “expected” to. This is your day and you want all good and positive vibes.
Talk to your fiancee first and make sure you are on the same page about the following:
- Size of wedding: Are you having a small wedding with 25 guests? A bash with 400? This is helpful in either pairing down the party or extending it out.
- Reciprocity: Were you a maid/MOH in other weddings? Do not feel that you must have someone in your wedding party just because you were in theirs.
- The future: Can you see this person by your side if you have children, being in your life still in 20+ years? Do not ask someone simply because you need more people or feel obligated.
- Consider their financial/logistical position: Saying yes to a maid/man role comes with a cost, and it may cause financial pressure for that person. Does he/she live out of state and will incur extra travel costs? Are they between jobs, or in school? He/she could wind up dropping out and causing anxiety on both sides.
- Equal number: Do not stress over this. It does not have to be equal on both sides.
- Do not worry about traditions or opinions. Do what feels right, it’s your day. If there is someone you think you should ask out of obligation but you foresee drama, do yourself (and the rest of your party) a favor and give that person a different role in your wedding.
- If the thought of a large wedding party causes you anxiety, then make it simple! Have one or two people who are closest to you.
Consider these people carefully. They play a pivotal role in your day and you will want to be surrounded by supportive and reliable people to help you. Make a list of those you are thinking of asking and then assign the roles.
Maid/Matron/Man of Honor
Your maid of honor, matron of honor (if she’s already married), or man of honor (MOH) will be your right-hand person both before and during the big day.
Your MOH will be in charge of delegating tasks to the other bridesmaids, assisting with dress selection and fittings, organizing and hosting special events like your shower, bachelorette party, and other important milestones with you. She’ll also be the go-to contact on the day for any emergency issues that might arise.
This person should be supportive, organized, and positive, someone you trust completely, who knows you better than anyone.
Bridesmaids/Bridesmen
Your bridesmaids/men will play a huge part in the preparation and planning of your big day! They’ll help the MOH organize your pre-wedding celebrations and help with DIY projects.
You will also spend the morning of your wedding with them getting prepared for the big day. You’ll want to surround yourself with people that you can truly relax and have fun with.
Best Man/Woman
The best man/woman will be your groom’s number one sidekick in the lead up to the wedding day. This person needs to be reliable in order to take these responsibilities on board. He/She should also be somebody that keeps cool under pressure and can take control of group situations like formal attire measurements and fittings, and the bachelor party.
Groomsmen/maids
Your groomsmen/maids will be there to support the groom in any way possible and complete any tasks delegated to them by the best man/woman.
This group will greet and mingle with guests on the day by welcoming them to the ceremony, sometimes accompanying guests to their seats. Your chosen groomsmen/maids should be dependable and friendly.
Once someone has accepted their role, you should give a thank you gift as a sign of your appreciation. These gifts show your gratitude for the place they have in your day. Some of our favorites for the maids are jewelry, matching robes, champagne, gift box with chocolates and coffee, Bride Tribe tee shirts, a spa day, etc. For the guys, we love the engraved flasks, good liquor, tickets to a game, etc.
You can see why it is important for many reasons to choose the right people to be in your wedding party. It’s a super exciting time in your life and you want those around you who feel that, too!
We can’t wait to meet you and your wedding party! Make your appointment so we can show you great looks for the bride, maids, and men!